Tezzeret + Post

-or, uncle skillz's cavalcade of fun

Really- I really was going to play a normal deck this week. That, and JT still has my LEDs from last weekend, and I was too busy cubing to get a deck together. Plus, all the sweet cards- and this one features Uncle Skillz.

 sideboard's on top- yes, that is a guardian beast

Did you know that Trading Post has, like, a million abilities? It's like having to cast Primal Command every turn! It is really hard to do that correctly! I'm sure I'm the last person to find out about that, but in case you were curious, it's a tough one.

Having said that, this is a Totally Sweet™ deck (I mean, it has the Post), and it might be one of the 'best' that Sean's handed me. 

Turnout was pretty sparse tonight, which wasn't really surprising- the week before a Prerelease is slow, even for Eternal formats. I spent most of the afternoon playing around with the cube before I realized that my last round of additions never actually made it into the cube, which was "a little frustrating".

And my round 1 opponent had Pernicious Deed in his deck!

Round 1: G/B Explorer w/ Josh

Josh was playing the Veteran Explorer big-mana style deck, with Deeds and Titans and other stuff. Mostly Deeds and Titans is what I remember, though.

Game 1 was pretty straightforward- he started on Treetop Village, I Wastelanded it, he only had one other land, I played Chalice on 1, made it a 5/5 with Tezzeret, and still had all these Wastelands.

Fortunately, Sean pointed out this deck's particular vulnerability to Pernicious Deed prior to our match, so I had the foresight to take out 3 Chalice and the Cursed Totem for the Phyrexian Revokers. Also, Sean was sitting next to me, and definitely cast a Thoughtweft Trio.  

wizened cenn died to counterbalance, kraftwerk trio in his hand

Game 2 was about as interesting, but less easy for me. Josh Therapied me (for Brainstorm, hah), then GSZed an Explorer on turn 3 and and hit the Tezzeret still in my hand. Luckily, I had only drawn one of the two basics.. he used his extra lands to cast a Liliana. My board of land, land, Baleful Strix got better when I cast a Revoker (on Deed), and I could even check his turn 4 Grave Titan with an Ensnaring Bridge. We went a few turns, he played some spells that were good, then Maelstrom Pulsed my Bridge. While I didn't exactly die on the spot, the plan of "chump with Creeping Tar Pit" is not known for the longevity it provides.

This time, I brought in the Guardian Beasts for a Trinisphere and a Chalice- Chalice seemed "not very good" in this matchup, though I'd really want it in the third game.

I led on Tar Pit into Strix, while he played a Pithing Needle on Tezzeret and Thoughtseized an Ensnaring Bridge. On my turn 4, I tanked for about a minute.. then tapped out to bash him with Strix and my Creeping Tar Pit. He tutored for a Thrun with Green Sun's Zenith, then I played Tar Pit #2 and hit him again. He cast a Top and a Kitchen Finks, putting him to 10. I hit him back for 7, then cast Guardian Beast. On his turn, he looked with Top, cracked a Wooded Foothills, looked again, cast Zenith for 0, looked again.. and had found a Needle for my Tar Pits. I sighed, played my millionth land, and put him to 1 via my Baleful Strix. He untapped, drew his Top, looked, and then said "noncreature artifacts, right?" as I was already putting my Baleful Strix into the bin. I couldn't attack with my Guardian Beast into his Thrun and Finks, and on his next turn he played a Primeval Titan which found 2 Treetop Villages. I had a chance to draw Ensnaring Bridge, but Trading Post couldn't prevent me from taking 16 damage next turn.

I realize now that Guardian Beast is probably better anti-Deed tech than the Revoker. That guy makes things indestructible, which is definitely not what I thought it did*.

Round 2: U/R Delver-burn

He laid into me with Volcanic Island into Goblin Guide on his 1. Strong.. but I played land, Mox Diamond into Chalice for 1, followed by Tangle Wire. A Tezzeret happened, and while Goblin Guide was really pulling its weight, the collection of 1-drops in his hand couldn't really get involved in the game.

I put him on Delvers, so I brought in a Ratchet Bomb for the Cursed Totem. 

show and tell resolves.. nice blue permanent! also, pay for daze w/ spirit guide

Also, our neighbors' match had already gotten into game 2. The Show and Tell guy was .. surprised? Shocked? His Brainstorm in response to Pyroblast didn't find anything helpful. I

Sure enough, he opened on Delver in game 2. I played City of Traitors, then Mox Diamond discarding Wasteland. My hand contained a Chalice and a Crucible- I led with the Crucible, since he had started on Volcanic Island. Obviously he Dazed it, but luckily missed on his first blind flip. He pinged me and cast another Delver. Without playing another mana source, I cast a Chalice on 1, which got Spell Pierced. On his turn, he showed me a Banefire, which, while confusing, did cause me to take 6 (down to 12). He cast a Grim Lavamancer. Unbelievably, my Trading Post next turn resolved, so I figured I was a lock to win this one. On his turn, I went to 6, and he passed without making a play. The Post put me to 10, then I untapped and played Ensnaring Bridge! 

"Surely any idiot could win this game now," I thought, as I fiddled with my lands. My opponent shot me with the Lavamancer, untapped and passed. I went up to 12, played an irrelevant nonbasic, then said go.

reddit.co: TIL Man vs. Nature isn't a fair fight 

msn.com: Area man takes million damage, all at once, regrets tapping Wasteland for mana

(He actually got me for exact, thanks to the Banefire.)

Having gained some more respect for his deck, I cut the Smokestack for another Ratchet Bomb.

 

Game 3 was a serious grind. My six was pretty good, and he snap-kept 7.

My turn 1 Chalice off Ancient Tomb got Forced, and my turn 2 Trinisphere got Spell Pierced. He played a  Delver on his 2, then countered my Tangle Wire. His first attack put me to 13 (missed his flip), and I luckily had enough lands in play to cast spells without getting shocked.  He blanked again, and the Delver put me to 12.

Then, having a bunch of blanks in my hand, the game turned around when I miracled into Trading Post, followed by Ensnaring Bridge. We passed back a few times after that, while I tried to buffer my life total as quickly as possible. At 12 and with 10 minutes on the clock, I cast a Chalice on 2 and a Trinisphere, thinking that I'd lock him out via Crucible/Wasteland. He politely played a third basic, using it for an expensive Ponder. I made a Goat with Post while he was tapped out. On my turn, I cast an Intuition into Tezzeret, using the +1 to draw a Ratchet Bomb.

His next play was a Sulfuric Vortex.

 

Efff.

 

So, I was at 13 to his 17. He cleverly redirected the damage to Tezzeret, which was unfortunate- now I was locked out of using the ultimate. Scrambling to figure something out, I drew another Intuition and an irrelevant artifact with Tezzeret. The gears were turning in my head.. maybe I can sac my Ensnaring Bridge to Post, get in with a giant Strix? I was hamstrung again- my Tomb was a blank, the clock was ticking down..

Trying to close out, I cast a Ratchet Bomb and passed. My opponent cast a Lightning Bolt at me, which finished off my last Tezzeret, and I responded with an Intuition for Baleful Strix. After that resolved, a spectator pointed out the Chalice I had played earlier. What a dagger. I tossed my Bomb into the bin and tanked in the end step. An extra Tomb got discarded for value in order to keep my Bridge relevant.

It wasn't enough, though- I had no way to answer the Vortex, the Price of Progress, and the clock all at once. 

After the match, Sean pointed out my error- when he had tapped out for Ponder, I could have returned my Tangle Wire and used the Post 2-step to keep him locked out! (I didn't get it at first either.) The plan is: in response to Ponder, make the Goat, then untap and sacrifice it to return the Tangle Wire, cast it. He taps out. I make a Goat and pass, he taps out again, then I start the soft loop again. It doesn't get around the clock, but my Tezzeret doesn't die that way, and surely any idiot could have won the game from there.

As it was, I died, but played out the last round for value.

Round 3: U/R Show and Science

Andrew kindly joined me in the dead bracket.
I felt bad 2-0ing him, but, well, Chalice for 1 is quite good.

In game 1, I played stuff which got countered, then stuck a Chalice on 1. A Crucible resolved, and Tezzeret showed up next turn to enhance it. He cast a Burning Wish on his turn, getting a Show and Tell. The Crucible put him down to 7, and I passed with Trinisphere in hand. Sure enough, he showed me an Emrakul, but I raised him an Ensnaring Bridge. I cast a Mox Diamond next turn and drained him out with Tezzeret.

While looking at my sideboard, I got the feeling that I had pre-boarded.

On the draw, I played Ancient Tomb, Chalice on 1, which resolved! * His turn involved him tanking, looking depressed, and playing Volcanic into Burning Wish for a Show and Tell. I hit the Volcanic Island with a Wasteland and passed back, but didn't have enough action to capitalize on my disruptive start. A few turns later, he cast the Show and Tell for Griselbrand and activated it instantly, which put him to 9. He discarded a bunch of 1-drops.

I cast a Cursed Totem on my next turn (timely), which got Forced.. so I attacked with the Baleful Strix I had cast a few turns ago, to the surprise of the people around me. I mean, he went to 7! I figured I might get him. Well, he actually attacked, and -then- drew another 7, casting a Show and Tell. It resolved, and fortunately I had drawn an additional Strix to square off against his Emrakul. I declined to attack this time, and played a Post which got countered. His attack left me with no lands, Chalice on 1, Crucible to his Petal, Petal, Volcanic, Island. (Looking back over my notes, we forgot to have him gain 7 from Griselbrand. Sorry!)  He burnt his last Wish on an Eye of Nowhere for my Crucible, which was brutal.

So, it was my Chalice against his two lands- well, one; I peeled another Wasteland to put him on basic Island.  I drew an Ancient Tomb, and eventually some more lands. A Trading Post got countered, as did my Crucible, and so did a Tangle Wire (with a hardcast Force). However, the Tezzeret I played last (with my Tomb putting me to 1!) resolved, and the (-4) was enough to get him- he was at 4.
♣

The rundown is brief:  This deck has a big game.  Sean said he went undefeated for 6 rounds at the SCG Open before getting a game loss for drawing extra cards, then drawing a match and getting knocked out.

We talked about this one for a while, Sean and I, and we agreed that Academy Ruins was terrible- the Post gives you enough recursive effects that it was more annoying to have an extra colorless land.  Buried Ruin and Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth both got us excited, and we may try that out next time.

Let me know if you liked the pictures of random game states! And I promise I'll try to win a relevant match next time, though it was way closer this time

Until next time, remember what all your cards do. ∎

Value Enchantress

-or, riffle shuffling five thousand dollars

After the cool response last week, I figured I could give Sean another shot at putting a horse into the money. And did he ever have a nice one..

not typing out decklists any more

Basically, the plan is to locate a Serra's Sanctum and activate a Candelabra or two, which generates infinite beaucoup mana.

Andrew and I showed up early and did a Winston draft with the pauper cube, and then we got burritos with Sean and Yido. I think we talked about racial slurs- their etymologies, literal meanings, etc- for the duration. Maybe there was a discussion on sweet tea.

Since the SCG Invitational is this weekend, there were some ringer-types at the shop "testing", which I (correctly) assumed meant that I'd be explaining what most of my cards did for most of the rounds. Though, thinking back on it, that isn't- well, that always happens with these decks.

[Aside: Sean is nigh-on-fanatical about never using English cards that aren't Beta. Some of the shop's regulars feel strongly about this particular quirk, especially when they let Feld der Unterdrückung resolve with two fetchlands in play. Personally, I kind of like it. Given the option between Brainstorm or Gedankenwirbel..]

Round 1: RUG Delver w/ Lauren
My opponent was an amicable out-of-towner that I didn't know personally. We chatted for a bit about the invitational, the local shop, nice stuff- but it got a bit awkward about here.
"So, how'd you qualify for the Invitational? Points-"
"I won the last one."
"Oh. Um."
I kept Exploration, 2 land, Argothian Enchantress, 2 Presence, Heartbeat on the draw. Topdecking a land on turn 2 wasn't enough, as he stuck a Tarmogoyf on his 3 or 4 and countered the next five spells I cast. I died with three lands and an Exploration in play.

Since some of the singletons seemed to be a bit slow and clunky, I brought in Blood Moon, Ground Seal, and City of Solitude for Moat, Oblivion Ring, and the Copy Artifact.

It didn't really matter, though- I kept another two-lander and got Wastelanded twice. I drew out of it, but by then Lauren had generated five power's worth of humans and insects with nary an Elephant Grass or removal spell in my deck. Even though I drew the combo (Candelabra + Serra's Sanctum), it's not at it's best on an an otherwise empty board.

Meanwhile, my neighbor at table 8 had his opponent show up five minutes late and concede- and then immediately ask Sean for a deck. And I had to play this match? Against this guy?*

Round 2: Merfolk
My opponent in the loser bracket had actually signed up late, having just gotten in from Pensacola. (I forgot your name, buddy. Sorry. Well, you'll probably never read this. Yeah.)
I lost the roll, snake eyes to boxcars. Inauspicious. His start off a double mulligan was foil Unhinged Island, pass, ask what Exploration did. When he cast a Vial the next turn, I wasn't surprised, nor was I when any of my Enchantress effects didn't resolve. Soon I was at 12, facing 11 power worth of fish, with had an opportunity to set up a Heartbeat into Moat next turn to stay alive. Unfortunately, my opponent knew what that card did and used the extra mana to level up his Coralhelm Commander and kill me.

Looking back, I suppose the Coralhelm Commander was going to kill me either way. That guy flies! How embarassing. 
I brought in the extra City of Solitude and the Replenish for the Energy Field and the Wheel of Sun and Moon.

 In the second game, my opponent's draw was significantly faster, Vial into Adept into Master with Wasteland backup. I did stick a City of Solitude (after I ran a Presence into a Force), but the City does not offer much protection from things which attack. My note sheet says I took 3, then 9, and I'm pretty sure there was roughly 16 damage on the board when I conceded.


When discussing the next iteration, I brought up the topic of Elephant Grass or Solitary Confinement as a way to die slower. Sean's counterargument was concise:
"Casey, the deck is called Value Enchantress. Not Internet Enchantress, not Good Enchantress. The purpose of this deck is not to win, it is to commit as many dollars worth of cards to the table as is possible.
Also, I fucking hate Elephant Grass, as it is a card for pussies."


Round 3: Devin
Devin's a local player, and a generally cool guy. He was playing his standard deck.
In game 1, I drew Emrakul relatively early and also cast it relatively early.
Game 2 was a bit more difficult- I saw him bring about ten cards in. I got double Duressed, my Heartbeat got Ringed (after I had tapped out for it, too), but he couldn't put enough pressure on before I amassed a critical amount of value enchantments. Eventually a Words of War dealt him 20.

Round 3.5: JT and the DQ
JT and I cut out to get Blizzards after this match. I ended up paying.
See, JT and I like to gamble with each other. Before this particular trip, we had done all kinds of things to decide who pays- flip a coin, odd or even, etc.- but the previous time we had been feeling clever, and decided to use the cashier's birth month to help us decide. JT had asked, "were you born in the first half of the year or the second half?". JT's (obvious) (vocal) disappointment at "the first half" led us to explain the bet, and the cashier's response was to think for a moment then say, "Oh, hm.. actually it's in July.."
So we decided to be cleverer this time, and to just ask for the information, and we'd decide for ourselves. 
"Before I pay you, what's your first name?"  (I had "starts with a N-Z")
"What?"
"What's your name?"
"Joe!"
<my barely contained irritation, JT's celebratory dance>
<JT explains the bet>
"Oh, okay, it's actually Samir"
ಠ.ಠ 


Round 4: Maverick w/ Andrew
Andrew is the guy I drove with, and is a rad guy. He's been playing Maverick since I can remember him. Luckily, creature decks tend to be relatively straightforward for Enchantress decks.
My notes aren't clear from this match, to be honest- though I do remember untapping with 5 Candelabras, discarding thirty cards, and generally putting many permanents into play.

I had to talk him into playing the second game at all, but it was way more interesting- until I naturally drew the singleton Wheel of Sun and Moon and its soulmate, Energy Field. He eventually was able to tutor for a Qasali Pridemage, but by then it had been a million turns, I had a few candlesticks, and I was able to tap Serra's Sanctum for 6, 10, and "a lot". Words of War shot a Thalia, then his face. ♣


Looking back, I would make some changes to the starting 60, and probably cutting the red out for Words of Wind and Elephant Grasses. Unfortunately, that would reduce the overall value contained in the deck, so that's out. After all, the plan is to have a decklist that just can't be copied by Timmy Q. Internetguy- says Sean.

Next week, I have a Doomsday thing planned out.
Until then, just flip a coin. It's easier. ∎

Sept. 12th, 2012

(subtitle: U/W Vial hate-bears)

I'm still short a few cards for the U/W Miracle Counterbalance deck, and though I had planned to borrow them from the guy I drove with, I was led astray this week. I hadn't cast a Meddling Mage in some time, and, well, when you just get handed a deck..

Anyway, I'll try to summarize the list- I know there were normal U/W lands, with Wastelands and 2 Karakas. Mother of Runes, Meddling Mage, Swords, Brainstorm, Vial were 4-ofs.. Man-o-War, Jotun Grunt, Mangara of Corondor, and I think Stoneforge Mystic were 2-ofs, and there was 1 Jitte, 1 Sword of Fire and Ice, Geist of Saint Traft, were singles. There was a mystery number of Aven Mindcensors, and that rounds out what I recall.
4 Phyrexian Revoker, 3 Submerge, 3 Surgical Extraction, 1 Jotun Grunt, 2 Burrenton Forge-Tender was the sideboard if I remember correctly.

In the first round, I played against Anthony with a sweet Death's Shadow deck. I saw him laying it out before the tournament started, and I didn't really "get it"- but he totally steamrolled me in both our games.
In the first, I had a relatively slow start that got ripped up by Thoughtseize and Duress. He Gitaxian Probed me a few times before playing a 1/1 Death's Shadow on turn 3. I had a Mom and a Meddling Mage on Force of Will (it was nice to have seen his decklist before round 1) with a basically empty hand. When I tried to race him by using my Mom to sneak in 2 damage, he showed me his grip of Dismember + Snapcaster on Dismember to wrath me and also make his Shadow a 9/9. When I cast Man-o-War, he laughed out loud then Forced it. At least I had hit with my Meddling Mage..

I didn't really have anything to bring in, but I was totally over Man-o-War already, so a few Revokers tagged in.

In game 2, I kept my seven with two lands, Vial, various creatures. He Forced my Vial, pitching Jace, then killed every creature I played. I wasn't really in this game, though I do remember cleverly realizing that he would never play two Shadows at the same time, which would let me 2-for-1 him by Swords-ing one of them. Someone paying less attention might have lost this game, but as it was, I didn't have enough removal to keep up with his back-to-back monstrous Shadows.

In the second round, I played against Chris with the U/R Show and Science deck. I kept a Karakas+Wasteland opener on the play and didn't draw a blue source for my Meddling Mage before he cast Show and Tell into Omniscience into Griselbrand (which got Karakas'd!) into Emrakul. On turn 3. The Man-o-War I showed into play was.. minimally effective.

In game 2, I kept a sweet one with Vial, Mangara, Karakas, Thalia, and other lands. When my Vial resolved on 1, I was sure I couldn't lose this one. Then, inexplicably, I cast Thalia on 2 (which obviously got Dazed). Chris Pondered a bunch on his turns. On my turn 3, I declined to run my Mangara into the myriad counterspells I had since put him on, and just passed. Then on his turn 4, with my Vial at 3 and Mangara in my hand, Chris Showed an Omniscience into play and cast an Emrakul. Maybe I should have talked Sean into some Stern Proctors for the board.

After that one, I dropped and played some games with my pauper cube.

Looking back, I probably was a little loose with the opening hands I kept. They tended to be durdly, and I imagine decks like this need to be aggressive and disruptive to be effective at all.

Next week, I plan on playing the UW Miracles deck, so look forward to that.
Until next time, remember to avoid temptation.
Casey

First

Hello.
Among other things, this blog is intended to display and/or discuss some "rogue" (read: bad) decks and their performance in my weekly local Legacy tournament. Depending on what happens week-to-week, I may play a good deck or a "Sean-style brew". Maybe I'll give tournament reports, maybe I'll talk about how delicious my burrito was this week- but I promise to be as entertaining as possible, and to update once a week.
Thanks for tuning in.